A Chronic Entrepreneur: CJ Scarlet
CJ Scarlet is a woman with an extraordinary story. In her career alone – she’s worked as a photojournalist and editor for the US Marine Corps, Executive Director for the Kids First Child Advocacy Center in the US, Director of Victims Issues at the NC Attorney General’s Office and been the CEO of three separate companies. She has worked as an advocate for victims of sexual abuse for years, drawing from personal experience to help support survivors of sexual violence. CJ was a victim of sexual abuse as a child, and again in her late teens and early twenties. The depression and anxiety she felt as a result, took its toll on her health – mental, emotional and physical. She developed two autoimmune conditions – lupus and scleroderma – and in 2004 was told her condition was terminal. At this point she was so ill that she could barely walk or hold a cup of tea.
At this time she met privately with a Tibetan Buddhist lama who told her, kindly, to stop feeling sorry for herself and instead put the happiness of others before your own. She took the advice and began prioritising small acts of kindness – which lead her to experience a sense of gratitude and fulfilment that she’d never experienced before. She credits this change in outlook to the remission of her condition. And to this day, CJ is thriving, personally and professionally, and working to help others live a life of joy.
What’s your Chronic Illness?
I have lupus, scleroderma and bipolar disorder.
Where/when were you diagnosed?
1986 for the bipolar disorder, 1990 for the lupus and scleroderma.
What does being an entrepreneur mean to you?
Being an entrepreneur means having the flexibility to create my own schedule according to my needs, which enables me to accommodate my illnesses.
What came first, the chronic or the entrepreneurism?
Although I’ve always had an entrepreneurial spirit, the illnesses came first.
How did this path come to you?
My dad was an entrepreneur and my grandfather was a prolific inventor, so I came to it through my exposure to them. I also am very curious and innovative, qualities that make for a good entrepreneur.
Did you go through any sort of 12-stages of grief with the diagnosis or take it in its stride? How did the process manifest itself? Did you immediately reassess your life?
When I was first diagnosed, I just took it in stride. But when I was told I was terminally ill in 2002, I freaked out and dove into a deep depression. Fortunately, I was able to work through the grief and, by following the advice of a Tibetan Buddhist lama, I was able to heal my body to the point that my condition went into remission. Now I am grateful for the illness experience, as it forced me to deal with my issues and learn to care for my body.
Did you seek out or join organisations representing your chronic for support or did you find comfort and answers elsewhere? What would you recommend in hindsight?
I was diagnosed before the Internet existed, but did a lot of research once the Internet was available. I found the Lupus Foundation and eventually became a member of the board of directors of the NC chapter.
How have you changed, if at all, in your relationships, decisions and values?
My illness experience positively transformed me in every way.
What is your life philosophy and has this changed?
My philosophy is that we are all fighting a heroic battle (whether it is an illness or a loss, etc.) and that it’s not about what happens to us, but how we choose to respond that matters.
What do you wish you’d known before?
Wow. Not sure about this one.
Are you on any treatments? Why/why not?
I’m still on about 20 meds, but my condition is in remission. I do experience a number of unpleasant symptoms (gastric, etc.), but I don’t let them affect my attitude.
What advice do you have for others starting out on this journey?
Read my book, Neptune’s Gift: Discovering Your Inner Ocean. Within its pages you will find the secrets to a happy life, despite the ‘storms’ in your life.
What is a ‘bad day’ for you?
A bad day occurs after I’ve spent the night being sick to my stomach all night and I’m exhausted for the next two days.
What do you do on a ‘bad day’?
I nurture myself by clearing my schedule (if possible) and resting.
How do you deal with stress?
I don’t experience much stress any more, but when I do, I meditate.
What do you struggle with the most?
Nothing!
What are you most proud of?
My ability to heal my body through performing acts of kindness.
Who are your back up dancers?
LMAO! My backup dancers are my sons, my daughter-in-law, my grandchildren and my sister (who also has lupus).
Best bits of being a Chronic Entrepreneur?
I am very attuned to other people’s needs and that makes me a good businesswoman. I LOVE being able to create my own schedule!
Worst bits of being a Chronic Entrepreneur?
Having to perform on days when I don’t feel well.
Are you a 5-year planner or are you winging it?
I’m winging it.
Dream weekend plans and have these changed?
My dream is to get a mountain home and a beach house where I can spend my weekends.
Ultimate dinner party guests?
Oprah, Deepak Chopra, Brene Brown, Dr. Joe Dispenza, Neil deGrasse Tyson.
What advice would you give your younger self?
Trust the process. It gets better. You are worthy.
What’s next?
Whatever I dream of!
How can people find you?
www.cjscarlet.com
cj@cjscarlet.com
www.facebook.com/cjscarletauthor
www.linkedin.com/in/cjscarlet
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