A Chronic Entrepreneur: Sophie
Sophie’s diagnosis took place whilst she was working in a demanding corporate role - where she had to manage the guilt of feeling like a slacker due to her need to take sick days off work, combined with the frustration of being in an unempathetic work environment and the confusion of not yet having a diagnosis. Through the process of being diagnosed, Sophie realised the problem was never her illness, but rather the environment she was in; an organisation that always expected “overtime and more.” After being diagnosed, Sophie quit her job and then switched to freelancing as a social media manager, which helped her build on her existing skills and eventually lead her to start her own business, Kitsune Creative Co, where she now has the ability to create a successful and rewarding career, but also put her needs first when required.
What came first, the “chronic” or the “entrepreneur”?
The chronic – but in a way I’m glad it did, otherwise I might still be stuck being stressed out and overworked for someone else!
How did the path of entrepreneurship come to you?
From having to leave my previous career. Long hours and stress made my conditions worse, and that was made even worse too by the company not being understanding, empathetic or accommodating with my illness. I was diagnosed while working there, and was still learning to adjust and what made my conditions flare up. Due to the environment making me more sick too I often had to be off work sick, and then not only deal with being ill but also the guilt and judgement from my managers. While I still managed to always get my work done and to a high standard (and also while being assigned extra projects too), it was definitely an organisation which expected overtime and more. Before I left, I was promoted to a higher level trainee role and the hours got even longer to some 12 hour days, which obviously then just made everything worse again. One day without warning I was called into a meeting with my manager and the HR department saying that they were demoting me to my previous role, which I didn’t have a say in. As I was close to almost being there for 7 years, which entitled me to long service leave pay, I decided to wait it out until that date and then quit without a plan of what to do next.
I also ran a health and wellness blog in what little free time I had, so I knew I wanted to do something with that as well as generally change my career to combine my love of being creative and the digital and online world. I’d planned to try and look for part time roles to have more of a balance, but didn’t really have any luck there.
It ended up being perfect timing though, as a friend was launching a start up brand and needed a social media manager. I combined this with other freelancing roles and making money too from my blog.
Eventually I finally launched Kitsune Creative Co, focusing mainly on Wordpress website design. Experience from digital marketing, running a blog and copywriting, websites I’d already created plus also all of the retail, financial, logistic and general marketing knowledge and from my previous career all combines really well. It means that I’m not able to just create beautiful websites for my clients, but I also have a strong understand of financials, customer experience, and logistics, which I can help them with too.
What’s your frame of mind like at the moment? How have you survived the pandemic?
I’ve actually loved it. Just before it started I decided to properly create a website for my business and upskill in a lot of areas too, so it was the perfect time to organise all of this. Since then I’ve been so busy in business too that it’s been a relief just to be able to focus on this without feeling pressure or guilt to do other things. I realised too that for me there are often times in “normal” life where I can’t go and do things that I want to because I’m tired or sick, so it’s a way of life I’m actually pretty used to. So having the world slow down too has been nice for me.
What’s your diagnosis story? How old were you?
As being sick required doctors certificates for work at the time, my doctors eventually realised that something more was going on. It took a while to schedule the specialist appointments and tests and then finally be diagnosed; both of the processes started around the same time and took around a year in total from the start to the diagnosis. I think I was around 25 at the time (I’m 33 now)
What have you learnt about yourself through this journey? How have you changed, if at all in your relationships, decisions, what you value/your life philosophy?
Even though I’ve always been a hard worker there was a lot of guilt I’d still felt from my previous career that I was slack. Even though I knew this wasn’t the case it’s nice to really know that I do work hard and can build a successful business, and that the problem was never my illness but the environment I was in. I also feel more driven to succeed too as I don’t want to go back to that environment, so I need my business to do well! In terms of personal growth I think I’ve generally just changed as people do when they get older; I’m a lot more focussed on my business and connecting with people and friends who are like minded. Both my illness and running a business do make personal relationships harder though as I have limited energy each day I need to put myself first. Luckily most of my friends and family are understanding that it’s never personal if I have to cancel or don’t have the energy to catch up!
Did you go through any sort of 12-stages of grief with the diagnosis or take it in its stride? In other words, how did the grief process manifest itself – did you immediately reassess your life or was it more gradual?
I think at the time it was actually a relief. It was nice to know what was actually going on with me (although autoimmune illnesses are still quite mysterious in some ways) and also to show to those who were around me and at work that I wasn’t just lazy and making things up. There are definitely times though where I get frustrated that I have limitations or when I am really sick and feel like it’s not fair. For my AS diagnosis especially I did worry about the future as it can progress and get worse, and I joined some FB groups at the time which actually really didn’t help – rather than feeling supported and not alone they just scared me! Fortunately though I’ve managed that really well, so it’s not a concern anymore. There have been times too where I’ve been worried about the future (what if I get worse? What if I can’t support myself?) but now that just inspires me to work hard with my business and to ensure that I have back up plans.
What would you say to your ‘first-diagnosed’ self, or someone else who has just been diagnosed with a chronic illness?
As I mentioned above, some of the groups I found just scared me more than they helped. I believe in learning about yourself and taking control of your health, so I think it is important to do some reading but at the same time also not freak out about all of the things which may happen. Eventually it just becomes part of your routine and something that you learn to live with, so the best thing to do is try and not worry too much, while still trying to look after your health (as much as possible) and take the time to learn what works best for you. Friends and family sometimes won’t understand, so support groups can be helpful from that perspective, just as long as they’re helpful (and not scary!)
Best & worst bits of being A Chronic Entrepreneur?
Being an entrepreneur and business owner is hard work at the best of times, and having a chronic illness definitely adds an extra challenge. However the flexibility I have means I’m able to better manage my health and rest when I need to, and this drives me to make sure I’m successful and never have to go back to working for someone else!
Are you on any treatments? What modalities are in your wellness team?
For my narcolepsy I take medication to help keep me awake, but for my AS I’ve been lucky that it’s been quite mild so now I only need to take mild anti inflammatories when I get really sick and run down. Being able to work for myself and on my own schedule has really been key for me to manage my conditions; I can sleep in and rest when I really need it. I also like to weight lift and take herbal medicines too, and obviously make sure I do the basics like getting enough sleep.
What is a ‘bad day’ for you? How do you look after yourself on a ‘bad day’ or a day that is particularly stressful?
A bad day for me is me being in bed all day. With narcolepsy being the worst of my conditions there are days where I just have no energy at all, even after my medication, so I’ve now learnt when I’m like that to just sleep (which is basically all I can do anyway). Thankfully now I’m able to manage my health better and make sure I don’t get to the point where I flare up badly. When I do get sick though with anything all of my conditions get worse, so lockdown again has helped there too as I haven’t been exposed to as much.
Who are your back up dancers?
My friends and family are all generally pretty understanding and supportive, my parents especially. It is hard for people to know what it’s like when they’re healthy/don’t have any chronic illnesses (even when they want to be supportive) so I try not to take anything personally and make sure I just look after myself.
Are you a 5-year planner or are you winging it?
While I definitely have some general and specific plans for growing my business I’m not one to ever sit down and make rigid 5 or 10 year goals in any aspect of my life. While I always have things I’m hard working towards, chronic illness has definitely taught me that sometimes life has it’s own plans and you need to just do the best you can and adjust accordingly.
What are your dream weekend plans and have these changed over the past year?
At the moment as I’ve been so busy with work (and with not much to do during lockdown anyway) I’ve often spend some of my weekends working. While this is good for helping me to catch up and stress less during the week it also means that now my weekend plans are just basically me getting to relax and not do any work! A very low bar there I know haha.
Who are your ultimate dinner party guests, (dead or alive), and who would you seat on either side of you?
I always find it hard to think of answers to this question as I’m definitely an introvert and like learning things on my own, rather than from other people (probably why I enjoyed lockdown too!). Tim Ferriss however I think would be interesting; he has such a wide knowledge base and I think he’d have some great tips to share! I also really look up to Dany Garcia, the amount of projects and things she has going on in her life is just insane; even with normal person energy I don’t know how she does it!
What are you looking forward to in the next 6 months-1 year?
Even though I have enjoyed lockdown I am looking forward to going back to normal life too and seeing my family in another state. It’s been a great time to really knuckle down and focus on my business, but I’m definitely due for a break and some holidays!
Where can people support you online?
https://www.instagram.com/kitsunecreativeco/
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